| Friday, February 24, 2006 |
|
MMMMMMM.....smokey treats |
|
|
I remember driving to Lawrence when I was a senior in HS in central kansas, and I was going to KU to see my brother, the infamous KenBob, and my mother was having a cow that I was 17 and driving hundreds of miles by myself. That might explain to alot of people how protected my mother wanted to keep me, and at times still does. Anyway, I bought a pack of cigarettes for the trip, becasue we had plenty of gas stations scoped out that we could get ciggies without getting carded. I probably strted smoking the second I hit I-135 North to Salina, and continues the entire trip east on I-70, and had a head rush the entire trip. I got a little freaked out awhile after a had passed a big green sign that said "Topeka 4", and I drove and drove and drove, and still no Topeka. I began to wonder if my mother wasn't right and I really had driven onto the highway to hell and it was dark and I really had only been to Lawrence once before and I was alone and it was dark and Topeka's bright lights weren't on the horizon and I was alone and it was dark and I had driven more than 4 miles and where the hell was I. Eventually I got to Topeka, and learned later that the sign had said "Topeka 47" but the 7 didn't reflect light correctly. So, I just had my first ciggie of the day. It reminded me of back in HS when I would get a head rush from all that nicotine flooding my precious little virgin body that had already consumed anough alcohol to get Elliot Ness worked up for life. (Carrie Nation I was not.) I still get a head rush from the first one every day, more so now that I have cut booze from the diet for 3 months. I miss the booze. Gypsy and friend and I were out the other night and I was sipping coffee, water, and diet coke (not the kind in the blue can) and I turned to friend and made a comment about how people were not so funny when I wasn't drinking, and that I had very little of interest to say without booze in me. I was hoping that at some point I would have this incredible epiphany that people really ARE funnier when I am sober and that one really doesn't need alcohol to have a good time, but it hasn't happened yet. Maybe I am just out of practice, or maybe I am too old to go back. The husband keeps asking me when I can drink again and I asked if I was less of a bitch when I was drunk all the time, because he seems very concerned about my alcohol consumption, and resumption of it. Maybe that's the epiphany I keep looking for.
|
|
| posted by Rosie @ 2/24/2006 08:59:00 AM |
2 comments
|
| Thursday, February 23, 2006 |
|
I wrote this yesterday...GUTS |
|
|
I have a very good friend in Baghdad, serving in the Army Reserve. I have known him 15 years, and his fiance is one of my best friends. Someone from his unit was killed this week. I have never thought very hard about the possibility of him not coming home. I am sick just thinking about it. I know another guy who got sent home after his humvee got blown up. His commander was killed and his buddy lost an arm. My friend is just really messed up in the head. Is it better to wear your injury where everyone can see it, or be able to hide it so that people have to get close to you in order to figure out how damaged or scarred you are ? I was just writing privately about Mark (currently in Bagdad), and how I am so mad at him for having way more guts than I could muster, when I thought about another friend's guts... I took another best girl friend to the hospital this morning so she could have a colonscopy and endoscopy, to hopefully determine why she is sick so much. Her guts are a wreck. She just turned 30 and her live-in boyfriend couldn't be bothered to take her or pick her up. She asked what else was on the schedule for the day, and I said, "well, after I take you to your, uh, uh" and she chimed in "anal probe. If I don't laugh about it I'll scare myself to death thinking about it". She's got guts.
|
|
| posted by Rosie @ 2/23/2006 10:55:00 AM |
1 comments
|
|
I love mornings, and meteorologists |
|
|
Ahhhhh, I have the luxury of working mostly from home. Every morning I sit with laptop in lap, drinking coffee, at least one cat nearby, watching Fox4 News, the only local news in the morning. I can't stand those Good Morning America-type shows. I'll get my national news from a reputable source - The Internet! - thank you very much. I also have a crush on the meteorologist, who is so tiny that I think I could put him in a mayonaise jar with some holes punched in the lid and keep him on a shelf in the kitchen. (Here is where I insert his name so that if he google's himself, he might learn that I stalk him thru the TV and feel flattered, but hopefully not creeped out - Don Harman) I always have a crush on a least one of our local meteorologists, as well as Jim C from Weather Channel. He seems to come to our town alot and broadcast live, although I have never bothered to get out of my chair and go hunt him down when he is broadcasting live. Usually it is snowing like mad when he is here, so getting to him does not seem reasonable. I hate winter so the closest I get to going to see him is gathering some firewood from the porch and nestling back down with the cat. Back to meteorology. I started my undergrad career as a meteorology student, but too many calculus classes that seemed irrelevant got in the way, and I came out 5 years later with a Latin American Studies degree. I wanted to study weather so that I could conquer my unreasonable fear of tornadoes. Therapy probably would have been a lot cheaper than tuition. Years later, I have mostly gotten over the tornado thing, with only a few nightmares about them annually. I think in my dreams they represent forces I can't control. Either I care less about things I can't control, or I control everything and have nothing to fear anymore. ;-)
|
|
| posted by Rosie @ 2/23/2006 10:49:00 AM |
0 comments
|
|
Tom Tom Club said it best |
|
|
The first time I ever heard TomTom Club, Chocolata and a co-worker were dancing in circles around me while I sat on the floor of the co-worker's apartment above Waxman Candles (before it moved downtown). I giggled my brains out as they circled me rhythmically. Thank gawd there was a business beneath us and it was nighttime. This is my favorite TomTom Club song: Wordy Rappinghood What are words worth?What are words worth? - words Words in papers, words in books Words on TV, words for crooks Words of comfort, words of peace Words to make the fighting cease Words to tell you what to do Words are working hard for you Eat your words but don't go hungry Words have always nearly hung me What are words worth?What are words worth? - words Words of nuance, words of skill And words of romance are a thrill Words are stupid, words are fun Words can put you on the run What are words worth?What are words worth? - words Its a rap race, with a fast pace Concrete words, abstract words Crazy words and lying words Hazy words and dying words Words of faith and tell me straight Rare words and swear words Good words and bad words What are words worth?What are words worth? - words Words can make you pay and pay Four-letter words I cannot say Panty, toilet, dirty devil Words are trouble, words are subtle Words of anger, words of hate Words over here, words out there In the air and everywhere Words of wisdom, words of strife Words that write the book I like Words won't find no right solution To the planet earth's pollution Say the right word, make a million Words are like a certain person Who can't say what they mean Don't mean what they say With a rap rap here and a rap rap there Here a rap, there a rap Everywhere a rap rap Rap it up for the common good Let us enlist the neighbourhood It's okay, I've overstood This is a wordy rappinghood, okay, bye. What are words worth? are words worth? - words What are words worth? What are words worth? - words He'll stop ... Don't stop ... Stop.
|
|
| posted by Rosie @ 2/23/2006 10:43:00 AM |
0 comments
|
|
oh, beautiful etymology |
|
|
I marvel at the English language. How does "skinny" not mean "having an excess of skin"?Did it come from someone who had lost LOTS of weight, then they had all this skin that was dragging and so they became known as "skinny" , which someone later turned in to "being really thin"? And did you know that "cock" come from old english as a diminutive suffix for names? So Hitch's son was Hitchcock. It is then easy for me to translate this diminutive connotation to explain why one's member is referred to as a cock in some circles. Alas, I assume incorrectly, as cock/penis comes from pillicock. And read on to learn more: pillock n. Idiot. You could almost decide having read this dictionary that any unknown British word is most likely to mean "idiot". And you could almost be right. We have so many because different ones sound better in different sentences. On the subject of the word in hand, I am told by a contributor that it's a contraction of the 16th century word "pillicock" (describing the male member) and by another (who admits to not being completely sure) that this may be a male animal with one lone testicle and derived from "bullock". It's funny, even if it's not true... (from English2american.com)
|
|
| posted by Rosie @ 2/23/2006 10:41:00 AM |
0 comments
|
|
WHAT size? |
|
|
I wrote this the morning of Valentine's Day... Last night I went and watched the KU v OSU game at my favorite watering hole - The Red Lyon. I DO mean favorite watering hole, because I am on a hard-core diet that is part of a research study (yes! getting paid to lose weight!) and I am not supposed to drink alcohol for 12 weeks (I goofed once and lost 3.5 pounds that week anyway. Is red wine a mysterious diet drug?) So, I am sitting there alternating diet coke and water while my friends glug down beer/whiskey/and a drink called a duck fart (why would you ever put something called a duck fart in your mouth?) and I notice brightly colored itty bitty pieces of sparkle on our table. Being a magpie by nature, I pick one up to examine it and decide if it needs to come back to my nest. And what is it? It's a "fun size" snickers, barely big enough to bother with. I was starting to lose interest in the game except for all the drunken Eddie Sutton stories that the announcers were telling and I began to become enraged. What is so friggin fun about a candy bar that is so small one could swallow it whole without having melted any of the chocolate off the outside? Is it "fun size" because it is petite, like one of those tart cheerleaders flouncing across the screen? Do things have to be miniature to be fun? Why isn't there a snickers the size of a loaf of wonder bread that needs hacked apart with a chainsaw so that you can share it with 38 friends - now that would be friggin fun! Not this microscopic speck of chocolate with one peanut and 4 mouse turds in it - seriously NOT fun. It's just another subtle marketing campaign designed to undermine my self-esteem and convince me to have drastic surgery to make myself more fun. Well, I have news for the snickers people, I am on to them, their game, and their wicked ways, and I am one helluva lot of fun at 5'9" and 22 pounds less than I was a month a go. Bigger is not better, but smaller does not mean fun, except in the case of baby animals - they are fun. And cute. I like ducks.Happy Vday, and think twice before you put something "fun" in your mouth today. "Fun size" is definitely going on the DISLIKE list.
|
|
| posted by Rosie @ 2/23/2006 10:37:00 AM |
1 comments
|
|
Oh, how I love words |
|
|
I have a problem with some of the words we use in our daily goings-on. I am continually collecting words I like, and words I don't like. Here is part of my collection: Words entered since the last post are indicated by an asterisk, not an asterick. The LIKE list: crotchety epiploica symbiosis tomasek (a made up word that means to schlep around, randomly searching for something when you can't really remember what you were looking for. Ex: I was tomaseking around the house when I found a dead mouse - also remind me of Kimberlee Tomczak who I think is SUPER!) SUPER refrigeradora (my favorite word in Spanish) architecture (sounds boxy) poop (short and sweet) personality disorder willies (as in "gave me the willies") gruntmeat (reference to poop) windbag angina pie Pi artichoke (i wish this was a verb) frumpy dulcinea voluptuous (it feel voluptuous when you say it) slash, as in I am I am a DRE/YAYA skidoo (restaurant speak for a collection of napkins rolled up with talc into a snake, wedged into your arse crack to absorb the sweat of standing in the kitchen all day) sklerglegerkin (something that I tend to blurt out when I have nothing clever to say) gnu conoco, but only if it is mispronounced with all long o's and emphasis on the middle syllable. Otherwise it is pronounced like Monacco, with emphasis on the first syllable. A friend from upstate NY always said it like that and I miss her since she moved to Vermont. albatross aubergine syrple (Thank you Roger Miller for "Roses are red, Violets are purple. Sugar is sweet, and so is maple syrple") lugubrious scurvy, especially with dog = scurvy dog balalaika - a Russian musical instrument with a triangular body and three strings that sounds somewhat like a mandolin bombed, as in real drunk hurl - as in puke piecework - one of the best pals uses this to refer to quilting, knitting, etc, and she uses it in casual conversation buick, another reference to vomiting womit - more on vomit divan - a sofa/couch/davenport crick - small body of running water sidle - to scootch up next to scootch splendid banjo jingo mantequilla - sounds so much better than "butter" po-po = police awnry - ornery impudent dooblayvay - W in spanish; short (but not really very short) for "whatever" The UNLIKED list: moist ointment salve physician (can't we just use doctor? Physician sounds very windbaggy) constable plethora (overused!) forte (overused AND mispronounced by most folks) plug slacks loosemeat (not a refernce to poop, but to sandwiches. And my friends are always bringing this over so they can annoy me with "loosemeat sandwiches"). hose (especially in reference to pantyhose, which are works of the devil) sm-...the prefix that people attach to the second rhymey word. Ex: education smeducation. boquet garni hottie Fun Size (see other post on What size?) This infuriates me! Words spelled with a K that are normally spelled with a C. Ex: We ate lunch at the Kountry Kitchen, where someone was giving away Kute Kittens. lung cookie nucyoolar (W just can't say nuclear) reconstituted family (in the 80's, social workers and sociologists used this to refer to a family that was comprised of people who had been in other relationships, and brought their offspring into a new relationship. I think Blended family is what I heard them last called, although I don't know that they need to be called anything other than a family) Limerance (a bar in my town that some friends are thinking of buying and changing the name to Limerick's where we can have a proper Irish pub. Limerance is a bad name because most people already call it Limerick's) sweeeeet - comes out of my son's mouth too often Missoura - it's pronounced Ma-zoo-ree supper panties warsh - we wash cars, not warsh them Marry - but only on menues. As in "the balsamic spritz marries the subtleties of the truffles and the kelp in a magical relationship". Whatever! These are just a handful of the things that people say that stick in my craw (Oh, I love that phrase!) and I will forever be gathering and updating the LIST.
|
|
| posted by Rosie @ 2/23/2006 10:19:00 AM |
1 comments
|
|
Musings of a dieting housewife |
|
|
Some thoughts from my kitchen... I love preserved lemons. I eat them straight from the jar that I keep in my frig. I made them myself. Well,as much as I can for living nowhere near sea salt or lemon groves. I feel exotic. They make me think of Morocco. They make me forget that I am nowhere near the sea or a lemon grove. They taste like an electric jolt to my tongue. A jolt of sharp, saline citrus, pungent and clean. They don't leave a bitter taste in my mouth even though they remind me of tears. I slurp them down at the sink, staring out the window, wondering if the chicken defrosting on the counter is going to make us sick later.
|
|
| posted by Rosie @ 2/23/2006 09:38:00 AM |
0 comments
|
